Today we're gonna talk about that one person everybody knows that can't help but exaggerate everything he says to the nth degree. Everybody knows at least one exaggerator. This is the guy that when he speaks you are constantly thinking in your head "that never happened" or "i gotta verify what he just said with someone else". There are certain rules that go alone with having a conversation with this guy. For example: every time he mentions anything of numerical significance, you have to slash the number by at least 50 percent. If he says "I sat in traffic for 2 hours today" then you know it's really one hour. If he says he won 50 bucks in a poker game, in actuality he only went up 25. When he says he's a "die-hard Yankees fan" you know that he probably can't even name 2 pitchers in the rotation.
We've got to step up to the plate and call out their bluffs people! For way too long have we sat back and listened (albeit half-consciously) to bogus monologue. What attempts have you made to salvage society from this type of person? Man up! Become an arbitrator and inflict justice on this earth!
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Did you know...
...that Michael Jordan actually wore a number other than 23 and 45 at one time in his career? I'm not even talking about #9 he wore for Team USA. That's right- here's a fun tidbit of useless knowledge: MIchael Jordan, for one game, actually wore the number 12 while playing for the Chicago Bulls.
We knew. Now you do, too.
We knew. Now you do, too.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Monday, April 20, 2009
Did you know...
[This one goes back a while. Kudos goes out to some people as well as there were several who have contributed.]
...that there is actually only ONE adventure in Six Flags Great Adventure. That's right- it's not Great AdventureS as so many people mistakingly believe. Here are several other common things which are erroneously given an extra "s" at the end:
Sabra Pizza- It's not the 'pizza of Sabra'. It's just one Sabra...and yes, we're sure.
Silver Spring, Maryland- That's right- there's just one silver spring in the entire Maryland!
Lander College for Men- Not the college of a man named Lander.
Anyway, there are some more out there and we'd love to hear from you.
We knew. Now you do, too.
...that there is actually only ONE adventure in Six Flags Great Adventure. That's right- it's not Great AdventureS as so many people mistakingly believe. Here are several other common things which are erroneously given an extra "s" at the end:
Sabra Pizza- It's not the 'pizza of Sabra'. It's just one Sabra...and yes, we're sure.
Silver Spring, Maryland- That's right- there's just one silver spring in the entire Maryland!
Lander College for Men- Not the college of a man named Lander.
Anyway, there are some more out there and we'd love to hear from you.
We knew. Now you do, too.
Sunday, April 5, 2009
Friday, April 3, 2009
Do You Remember...? Classic Nickelodeon
I can't even begin to tell you how many times the conversation of "Old Nickelodeon Shows" comes up with me and some friends. There is no doubt that TV today doesn't live up to what it was when we were kids. I remember being so jealous of the kids that were chosen to be contestants on game shows like Legends of the Hidden Temple, Double Dare (I would have done anything to be slimed), What Would You Do, and Nick Arcade. Salute Your Shorts, Are You Afrain of the Dark, Clarissa Explains it all, Pete and Pete...all childhood classics. The one show I never liked was All That. This was basically a Saturday Night Live for kids, but was not funny at all (sort of what SNL is now). I don't get how the writers wrote that show thinking that it was even remotely funny. And the same goes for such horrible shows that are on now like Hannah Montana, Drake and Josh, and Zoey 101. Nothing was better than watching a 2 hour block of Nicktoons including Doug, Rugrats, Ahh! Real Monsters, and Rocco's Modern Life. Ahhh those were the days. Here are some memories:
Random Thought...
Isn't incredible how much ink was used trying to comment, critique, and explain the words of the Haggaddah? I would venture to say that it is the text that has the most commentary written about it in history!
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Did you know...
...that hillbillies and hicks drink so much beer at NASCAR events that after the nearby convenience stores are sold out of beer and the delivery trucks come to restock, they sell it directly from the truck due to such a high demand. Saw it myself one time at Texas Motor Speedway.
This brings me to a subsequent topic related to NASCAR. It's no wonder its the most popular sport in America. Yes, all of the following comes from south of the Mason-Dixon Line, but there are enough of them to support the sport (?) to put it at the top of the rankings. It's not about watching the cars go around at 160 MPH at all. The event actually starts upto 2 weeks prior to the actual race. Camping out and getting hammered for 14 days is the main part of the whole bout. In fact, quite a number of people don't even get to witness the actual race because they got locked up for doing something really stupid while being really drunk in the 2 weeks leading upto it. Next time you hit up the dirty south stop by with a camera...it's worth it!
We knew. Now you do, too.
Pesach Thought #2 - Kadesh
The Haggadah Kimotzei Shalal Rav quotes from Rav Shlomo Zalman Auerbach that normally during the year, we are so careful to make sure to eat right after Kiddush and not have any type of Hekseik between the Kiddush and the eating. Yet on the Leil HaSeder, there is such a large Hefseik between Kiddush and eating? We are Marbeh BiSipur Yitzias Mitzraim in between? Why isn’t this a problem? Rav Shlomo Zalman explains that the whole point of the night is to be
“Mikadeish HaLayla”, to sanctify the night. Everything that we do during the Seder is in order to give Kedusha to Leil Pesach. Therefore, the Haggadah isn’t a Hekseif from Kiddush, because we view it as part of the same long process of giving Kedusha to the night. This is an important idea to keep in mind and stress to everyone at the table; that we are not merely telling over a story or having a good time, rather we are being Mikadeish the night, and therefore it is incumbent upon us all to fill the night with as much Kedusha as possible.
“Mikadeish HaLayla”, to sanctify the night. Everything that we do during the Seder is in order to give Kedusha to Leil Pesach. Therefore, the Haggadah isn’t a Hekseif from Kiddush, because we view it as part of the same long process of giving Kedusha to the night. This is an important idea to keep in mind and stress to everyone at the table; that we are not merely telling over a story or having a good time, rather we are being Mikadeish the night, and therefore it is incumbent upon us all to fill the night with as much Kedusha as possible.
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
The original Ron Artest (click here)
Turns out Cedric "Cornbread" Maxwell beat Artest's 'Malice In The Palace'. There just wasn't ESPN around back then to blow it out of proportion.
Enjoy!
Enjoy!
L I double R: where to sit?
Here's my situation on the train the other day:
It was no surprise that my car would be relatively full as it was rush hour / peak time. Having just made it onto the train as the dings were going off and the door began to slide, I was not expecting to get a comfortable seat if even any at all. I noticed some vacant spots scattered around the car but was feeling very vulnerable. The seats were only 'In-betweens' whereby a 3 seat bench was occupied at both ends, and 'up-against-the-wall-next-to-a-sleeping-fat-guy' where by I'd be smudged up against the wall next to a fat guy.
Now at first glance the answer seems simple: wake up the sleeping fat guy, generate a mean stare-down from him, have him get up in a very grumpy manner, slide up against the wall with bag in hand (as this guy expects that since you actually had the audacity to wake him up and make him stand, he'll be getting more room than you because 1. he was there first 2. you woke him up) and take up as little room as possible. [Worrying about having to wake him up for a second time is another possible scenario. It stinks when you have to switch at Jamaica and he's going all the way to Ronkonkoma even though nobody lives in Ronkonkoma.]
On the other hand, it's kind of tempting to sit in between 2 people. The question is whether the 'urinal-rule' comes into effect or not. There is an unofficial rule of proper etiquette when there are 2 guys occupying the ends of a 3 set urinal. The rule is YOU CAN'T STEP UP TO THE MIDDLE ONE IF THERE ARE NO DIVIDERS. Now do we apply the same logic to the scenario at hand? On one hand the reasoning is not the same as the urinal rule. On the other hand- this can be an almost 30 minute endeavor depending on the destination(s) of all 3 guys. 30 seconds and 30 minutes can stimulate different emotions.
Anyway, in case you're wondering what I did that day I'll tell you: I stood for 25 minutes. Next time I'll be prepared though.
LIdoubleRed
It was no surprise that my car would be relatively full as it was rush hour / peak time. Having just made it onto the train as the dings were going off and the door began to slide, I was not expecting to get a comfortable seat if even any at all. I noticed some vacant spots scattered around the car but was feeling very vulnerable. The seats were only 'In-betweens' whereby a 3 seat bench was occupied at both ends, and 'up-against-the-wall-next-to-a-sleeping-fat-guy' where by I'd be smudged up against the wall next to a fat guy.
Now at first glance the answer seems simple: wake up the sleeping fat guy, generate a mean stare-down from him, have him get up in a very grumpy manner, slide up against the wall with bag in hand (as this guy expects that since you actually had the audacity to wake him up and make him stand, he'll be getting more room than you because 1. he was there first 2. you woke him up) and take up as little room as possible. [Worrying about having to wake him up for a second time is another possible scenario. It stinks when you have to switch at Jamaica and he's going all the way to Ronkonkoma even though nobody lives in Ronkonkoma.]
On the other hand, it's kind of tempting to sit in between 2 people. The question is whether the 'urinal-rule' comes into effect or not. There is an unofficial rule of proper etiquette when there are 2 guys occupying the ends of a 3 set urinal. The rule is YOU CAN'T STEP UP TO THE MIDDLE ONE IF THERE ARE NO DIVIDERS. Now do we apply the same logic to the scenario at hand? On one hand the reasoning is not the same as the urinal rule. On the other hand- this can be an almost 30 minute endeavor depending on the destination(s) of all 3 guys. 30 seconds and 30 minutes can stimulate different emotions.
Anyway, in case you're wondering what I did that day I'll tell you: I stood for 25 minutes. Next time I'll be prepared though.
LIdoubleRed
Old Tv Shows! - Fox Kids Lineup Edition
Friday was the best day when we were in elementary school. It was the one day that we were able to watch the afternoon cartoons that our gentile friends got to see every day. I remember coming off the bus and turning on the TV to catch the Friday Afternoon Fox Kids lineup with my brother. One show that sticks out more than the rest is the classic cartoon: Bobby's World. Bobby's world was about the daily life of young Bobby Generic and his very overactive imagination on how he sees the world. The show introduced to us to Uncle Ted, who had a knack for giving great noogies. The show also included Bobby's mother, who sounds alot like Governer Sarah Palin.
Fox Kids also gave Taz his very own show called Tazmania which featured a whole new slew of characters. The show wasn't that great, and was very short lived, but when I watch these videos, it reminds me so much of my childhood.
There was the old Spiderman cartoon, Beetlejuice, and one of the greatest cartoons of all time: Batman, the Animated Series. Enjoy the Memories!
Fox Kids also gave Taz his very own show called Tazmania which featured a whole new slew of characters. The show wasn't that great, and was very short lived, but when I watch these videos, it reminds me so much of my childhood.
There was the old Spiderman cartoon, Beetlejuice, and one of the greatest cartoons of all time: Batman, the Animated Series. Enjoy the Memories!
Pesach Thought #1
Throughout the week, we will try to provide our readers with some thoughts on the upcoming Holiday of Pesach. We hope you enjoy:
Next Tuesday night, we will all gather with our families in our homes to perform the Mitzvah of Bedikas Chametz. After we search, we put what we found aside, and burn it the next day together with the feather and spoon that we used to collect the Chametz. R' Mirsky in his 
Hegyonei Halacha Haggadah suggests that one should also burn the candle with which he searched his house for Chametz. Why is this necessary? Did the candle touch the Chametz? R' Mirsky quotes the Belzer Rebbe who explained that the candle was used to look for something negative. The rise of the yeast in Chametz represents haughtiness, and negative Middos that one may carry. the candle is symbolic of an attitude of always looking and searching for the negative attitudes of an individual. Such an attitude must be completely destroyed from this world. We can never tolerate such an outlook on life. Let us take this lesson of the Belzer Rebbe to learn to always look for the good in people, in our homes and communities.
Hegyonei Halacha Haggadah suggests that one should also burn the candle with which he searched his house for Chametz. Why is this necessary? Did the candle touch the Chametz? R' Mirsky quotes the Belzer Rebbe who explained that the candle was used to look for something negative. The rise of the yeast in Chametz represents haughtiness, and negative Middos that one may carry. the candle is symbolic of an attitude of always looking and searching for the negative attitudes of an individual. Such an attitude must be completely destroyed from this world. We can never tolerate such an outlook on life. Let us take this lesson of the Belzer Rebbe to learn to always look for the good in people, in our homes and communities.
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